What to do When Your Child Loses Her Glasses?

Question: My 6 1/2 year old lost her glasses and certainly can’t afford to replace them. Help!   Answer: Respond with empathy and hand the problem back. ” This is so sad, you lost your glasses, what are you going to do to replace them?” Empathy keeps her from getting defensive and to start blaming others for [...]

Defiant 10 yr old Daughter

Question:  My 10 yr old daughter is so defiant.  I “pawned” her beads a few days ago with a price tag of $2.00 due by end of day yesterday.  She didn’t care, so there was no positive that I can see from that. Yesterday she was arguing with me and I started charging her.  She [...]

My Child Isn’t Upset When I Punish Her

Question: We are struggling with our 7 year old.  She’s usually very well behaved but when given a punishment, she just agrees.  She says “okay” and goes with it.  Her dad recently had her do push ups for jumping up and down throwing a baby-like temper tantrum.  She willing went down and did her push-ups.  Any [...]

What to Do When The Response to a Choice is “No”

Question: I have a 2.5 yr old boy (spirited and strong will) and when I give him choices, he  sometimes refuses both options and gets mad. Sometimes we can go with a “no” choice option from him but sometime not  Any advice?   Answer: When you hear “No” to a choice, don’t get stuck.  Just choose [...]

My 1 Year Old Bites – Help!

    This is a common question I get from parents of toddler.  What do you do about biting or hair pulling.  Keep it simple and be consistent.  Try the following: 1. Be thankful for misbehavior.  Let him learn now, when the consequences are small which behaviors he/she experiments with have happy or sad endings. 2. Respond with [...]

Mom’s Word is Gold

One mom shared with me  her day turning her word into gold.  Here’s what she said:   “I only give dessert to girls who share.” “I only play games with girls who brush their teeth.” “Mommy only plays superman with boys in their PJ’s.  (No more battle over PJ’s)” “Little boys who don’t put on sunscreen, don’t [...]

How Do I Get My Kids to Sit Still at Dinner?

Question: We are having trouble keeping the 3 kids seated for more than 5 minutes at a meal… Thanks so much! Jody Answer: This sounds like you need to use skills from all 3 skill segments – calm, cooperation and consequences. 1. Start with the Calm category – Empathy. Acknowledge that it’s hard to sit [...]

Withdrawal from the Power Bank

  Parents always ask me, “What happens when I give my child a choice and she says “no”, or just ignores me ?” Here is one of four backup skills you can use.  This one is called “make a withdrawal.”     When it was time to leave our friends house after dinner, I asked my 4 year [...]

It’s time to go…I mean it!

You’ll love this story about a dad experiencing the difference in the effectiveness of choices versus the threats, warnings, and reminders.    Addison, my 4 year old daughter, and I were at the park. When we arrived the first thing I noticed was a frustrated mother telling her 3-4 year old son “It’s time to go, I’m not kidding!” [...]

Fill in the Gaps with Coaching

We read Love & Logic for Preschoolers book, but your coaching session filled in so many gaps.   Both Mary and I are getting to the place where we are not afraid of Eli’s bad decisions.  Just today Mary set the limit, Eli threw a fit and she still held the limit.  He stopped his fit and did [...]

Are You Sick and Tired of Having to Compete with Your Child’s Electronic Devices?

  I know a mother and father who eat a lot of cold food – all thanks to certain electronics corporations and their teen’s single-minded obsession with the darn things.   Yes! Nearly every night, these parents beg him to turn off the computer, turn off (or pause) the television, put down the video game [...]

Love and Logic for Adults

Eric was furious. “Look out the window, Sara. Our neighbor is building a fence. I’d swear that it’s on our property. I’m going out to stop that nonsense right now. He has no right to do that!”   “Hold on Eric. Let’s think about this. I’m mad too, but what did we learn last night [...]

When Kids Lie

There are few things that leave parents angrier, or more worried, than when their kids act “truthfulness-challenged.” The good news about lying is that kids do it. What I mean is that all youngsters experiment with bending the truth, and it doesn’t necessarily mean that they’ll end up becoming con men, criminals or politicians. That [...]

Will I Spoil My Baby?

Have you ever noticed that parenting “experts” are everywhere? The worst is when new parents bring home infants! Friends, aunts, and co-workers spring from the woodwork with sage advice from the ages. One common piece of advice is, “Let ‘em cry it out when they’re upset. If you pick ‘em up and comfort ‘em, they’ll [...]

Should We Force Children to Apologize?

  Since the dawn of time, parents have felt a tremendous responsibility to make their children apologize to others for their wrongdoings. “Go tell him that you’re sorry” must be one of the most commonly uttered phrases by adults at playgrounds throughout the world.   Here are some Love and Logic thoughts on the subject: [...]

Aren’t There Enough Unpleasant, Rude People in the World?

  If there weren’t enough pleasantness-challenged people in the world, there might be a good reason for creating more of them. But, as you’ve probably noticed, there seem to be plenty.   Mary is doing her part to increase the ratio of world niceness to nastiness. She also knows that nice kids are more likely [...]

Getting the Respect You Deserve

Do your kids wipe their feet on you like a doormat? Do you ever find yourself grieving because you’ve lost the dream of having kind, appreciative kids?   You’re not alone, and there are steps you can take to begin turning things around. • On a daily basis, remind yourself that you deserve to be treated [...]

Some Tips for Helping Anxious Kids

Like nearly all of the challenges faced by parents, anxiety in children has many possible causes and solutions. Fortunately, Love and Logic offers a variety of “experiments” to determine what might work best with each unique child:   Establish or strengthen family routines. With anxious, fearful kids, experiment with having set times for meals, bath [...]

Getting Them to Brush Their Teeth

Have you ever been amazed at how tightly children can clench their teeth together when you try to “help” them brush their teeth? I have! And, yes, I admit it, I’ve tried to brush a strong-willed child’s teeth, for them. Fortunately, I came to my senses before I lost a finger.   While we can’t [...]

How to Teach Your Child to Calm Down

The Uh Oh Song is a consequence skill that I teach from the Love and Logic program.  It’s based on teaching kids how to calm down.  Read how this mom successfully used this skill for her strong-willed 4 year old, and if you want to learn more, schedule your Free Parent Tuneup phone consultation by clicking here. My [...]

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